Installment 02 of the L’il Deb Chronicles

(While Deb Sanders is away on a tour of duty in Iraq, her alter ego – L’il Deb - is filling in for her at our EWGA functions.)

03May08…Can’t talk much as I’m being trussed up like a Thanksgiving turkey to go to Oakhurst Golf Course and participate in the Houston EWGA Chapter Championship.  If I understand my mission correctly, I will be the on-course rules enforcer which fits me perfectly.  I LOVE enforcing rules!  On the downside, I am obligated - once again - to participate in an interview after the round of golf.

Robin Anderson – Well, L’il Deb, we meet again.  How have you been and what have you been doing since the last time we talked?

L’il Deb – You don’t get out much do you?  If you DID, you would know that I spent a week in San Antonio in late April on a business trip with friends.  Since they refused to let me participate in the business part of the trip, I was forced to sit by the pool during the day, and follow them around during their inane exploits at night.  San Antonio is a great city though, so I enjoyed myself.

RA – I understand that you were a little upset before the Championship round started today.  Can you tell me what happened?

LD – I had been led to believe that I would be the Rules Enforcer for the tournament, but when I got here…

RA – Wait a minute.  What is a “Rules Enforcer?”

LD – First, do NOT interrupt me again.  Second, do you even PLAY this game?  The Rules Enforcer is the person who goes out on the course and smacks the people around who aren’t following the rules.  Duh!

RA – Uh… we have a Rules “Official” on the course during these tournaments who is NOT there to smack people around but rather to answer questions people might have about the rules.  Are you sure you weren’t told that you’d be a Rules “Official?”

LD – “Official”  -  “Enforcer”   What’s the difference?  I was supposed to be IN CHARGE.

RA – Okay, so you didn’t get to be in charge.  That job was given to two TRAINED Rules Officials, Allie Jarrett and Vickie Mathews-Clark, and we are grateful that they were here to help us out.  So, what exactly did you get to do?

LD – Found out that they were just going to let me ride around with the Rules Enforcer, and I put my foot down…

RA – With that tiny foot, how forceful could that be?  (Snicker…)

LD – That’s twice you’ve interrupted me, AND I have warned you before about making fun of my size!!!  I’m warning you ONE MORE TIME…

RA – Okay… okay… I just couldn’t resist.  Please go on.

LD – As I was saying, I put my foot down and said, “If I can’t be the Rules Enforcer, you can just leave me in the car!”

RA – So what happened?

LD – THEY LEFT ME IN THE CAR!!!!!!!

Sharing a soda with Elizabeth Hardy and Stacy Jones

RA – Bummer.

LD – You’re telling me!  But they did let me out when the tournament was over to participate in the awards ceremony and the non-handing out of trophies.

RA – Yeah… that was strange.  Our trophies were sent to another Chapter.  Hope they enjoyed them.  I guess the ladies who won today will have their trophies hand-delivered by our Chapter President when they arrive.

LD – Nah… I suspect Zona will delegate that to YOU.  I mean the Vice President’s job is so lame.  You have to add some value somewhere, and I suspect this will pretty much be IT for the year.

RA – Thank you for your support.

LD – My pleasure.  Did you SEE some of the scores our winners posted???  Holy smokes!  Show me that list of winners again!

RA – Gladly.

With Jan Smalley, Vicky Tickell, Lana Coble, Donna Choate and Zona Trahan.

LD - How do you pronounce the name of the lady who won the 4th Flight low gross?

RA – Ellen.

LD – You’re a real smart…

RA – PLEASE!  I can’t print that.

LD – Okay, how about this one on the scramble team?

RA – I pronounce that “Robin.”

RA – Well, uh… I… uh…

LD – That’s pretty much what I thought.  You know who REALLY signed up and showed up for this deal?  The ladies who pulled the whole thing together: Zona Trahan, Stephanie Tolsen, Ruth Richmond, Kay Adams, and Christa Cantele.  Janet Boatright - our Treasurer - showed up to make sure all of the financial stuff was in order.  Now THOSE ladies add value.  You!  Ha!  You just sit around and bother people.

RA – I think this interview is just about over.  Is there anything VALUE ADDED that you would like to say before we…

LD - NO!  Wait... I have a question for YOU.

RA - Uh-oh.   Uh... I mean, yes.  Feel free to ask me anything.

LD - Okay.  Well, I don't know about you, but I've been emailing Big Deb and telling her about all of the events I've been participating in with EWGA.  You know how Big Deb loves her golf!  But every time I get a reply from her, she tells me she didn't get to read my entire email because while reading it a BIG DUST STORM suddenly develops and she would lose it.  I can't believe that it happens every time.  Do you think she is missing participating in the EWGA events or is it just me?  You know… something personal?

RA - Oh!  I'm sure it's YOU!  You know with your little attitude you've got going...

LD - WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT MAKING FUN OF MY SIZE?????!!!!!!

RA - Hey!  Just a min...

The interview was suddenly ended when L’il Deb seized my pencil and broke it with ONE FINGER.  I grabbed my notes and high-tailed it out of there!

Hanging with the crew at Cypress Lakes.                    Special Agent – L’il Deb Sanders            Special Agent – The REAL Deb Sanders

Deb: From all of us here at EWGA Houston, THANK YOU for your service to our country! 

Also, Deb is really enjoying the notes that she is receiving from us. If anyone wants to write, they can reach her at pargirldeb@yahoo.com .